To the man I love..!

A letter for Him

on Friday, June 10, 2011 at 9:03pm

--panda--

I existed for 17 years trusting no one but myself… I cried because of a lost…I swear to myself, never fall, too much…I was completely perplexed in the month of June 2010 – the time, wherein I don’t have the slightest idea of devoting myself again after my catastrophic past.

Everything seems ordinary:
THAT DAY…It seems to me THAT DAY will past just like YESTERDAY …I’m wronged, that very day seems the START. All the days I’ve spent before that very day…keeps on haunting me with questions, “Do I really live my life the way it should be?”And “Did I just continue living out of grief?”

I do not know if I get the answers from these questions, the next thing I know is that, I completely fell in your aphrodisiac spell something that great Eros formulate out of passion. I gone to compete with Ares hand on hand but you’re the only one who beat me out of love. I continue to go out of control…but I’m afraid it will all end!

I never want to love you with predictable end…neither to lose you in unpredictable way. I live all of my 17 years not knowing how to love unconditionally. You’re the man I love second to my ORIGIN…I’m afraid – I’M AFRAID that somehow, someway…you will be like him. I’m afraid that this love will become extinct and leave no marks in the history of the Earth.

The only thing that consoles these FEARS is our bold castles in the air...I do not know if you are serious to live in those and make it come true… For God sake! I believe you...I trust you! Even though I trust you – it is still humane for me to doubt it? Is it? Will I live the life you’ve promised me? Should I just live on my past or continue to live my life in the future loving you?

Please tell me what to do…I’m no t the only person to decide because, I’ve been out of my mind since I start loving you!


--lab--